Monthly Archives: February 2009

Saturday’s Bog Papers – Wiping on the Guardian

One of Us! – Q&A with Pete Postlethwaite.
What was your most embarrassing moment?
Underestimating a spot of flatulence in a pair of white jeans. I was 28 and thought I was the bee’s knees.

Chris Dares to Speak the Truth – Have your say Letters – Red Hair
Regarding Mick Hucknall’s What I see In the Mirror (17 January), the problem I had with being a redhead at school was that people constantly called me Mick or sang Simply Red songs as I passed. That was far worse than the uncontrollable hair.
Chris Moulin
Shipley, West Yorkshire

Theo Walcott – Interviewed (ie being given shit) by Jack Stott, 6 years old.
Jack Do you play an instrument?
Theo I wish I did! I used to play the recorder. I play RockBand for the Xbox – does that count?
Jack No.
Jack You haven’t been there [top of the Premier League] for quite a while.
Theo Sorry?
Jack Ever since I’ve been watching you, you keep on like [does hand gestures] up, down, up – it’s like a big sea.

What I see in the mirror – Julia Houghton, 24. Student and Poet
My family are blond, so I like my brunette hair because it makes me different. I had my belly button pierced when I was 11.
The rest of the article is annoying white noise disguised as journalism. The sort of subsonic din which is purposely set up to make the readers spontaneously and involuntarily drop sausages into the hammock of their underpants.

Matt got out of MY side of the bed today – Culinary Questions Answered by Matthew Fort
I hear the Crock-Pot is the must-have kitchen device at the moment. Is it worth dusting out the one in the attic?
The Crock-Pot was one of the most useless, retrograde additions to the cook’s armoury ever foisted on the public……If you have one, smash it up and use the bits to go at the bottom of flower pots to aid drainage.

Nick earns points – Games News – Nick Gillett
Youtube for Wii & PS3
Consoles have been able to access the internet since Sega’s Dreamcast over-promised “6 billion competitors” all those years ago. 😦