Leaked Surgery Press Release #1

“Scale’s Straight-Jacket Dinner Party Gig”
The Old Wharf, 21 Oxford St.
Digbeth, Birmingham
B5 5NR

Doors Open at 8:00pm
*FREE ENTRY* so get there early!

People, hear this! You are invited, one and all, man and beast, sheep and shepherd to an evening of MUSICAL MASTICATION. Gobble up THREE BANDS!!! and digest the FREE ENTRY!!! for a musical evening of Cheese-Strings, Chicken Drummers, Sea Bass Guitar and hear them sing for their supper at THE OLD WHARF, Oxford St., Digbeth. It’s finger clicking good. *shriek*

As an appetiser the night’s curators, the unique four-piece “SCALE”, open the evening’s confusion and YOU WILL BEAR WITNESS!!! to their live debut that very evening. Such a thing has never before heard by human ears. Like a Massey Ferguson Traction-Engine pulling buckets of pins on a shingle beach, driven by the village nutter; such a thing may be never heard again!! *soils*

For our main course, Leicester’s favourite avant-punk party band, “COUSIN SCAMPI” are the filling in the night’s musical sandwich, wetting the mouth with punk inspired by church bells and witchcraft. Never approach COUSIN SCAMPI in the wild, simply nod the head, keep any exposed flesh covered and walk on bye. Address them once and once only FOR THEM BEASTS BE NOT OF THIS EARTH!! *gasps*

Finally. For one-time only. HEADLINING our night of candied-tinnitus-treats are tonight’s syrup drizzled pudding: “THE ARM”. Formed in a rockslide, these jagged acid post-rockers FEED ON THE TEARS OF WEEPING MEN and create rhythms and soundscapes that only their granite forefathers are immune to. Breaking the space time continuum, their instruments speak in tongues and are simply there communicate with future Gods. Bow down to Lightening Bolts, thunder, fairies and tinsel. BY GOLLY ITS AMAZING!!!! *faints*


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: